Darkest Depths of Love
by LadyLefaye
Summary: An alternate version of the episode The Crush. Drusilla deactivates Spike's chip, and now that the big bad is back, there is hell to pay. WARNING: rape and character death. This is a very dark fic. SpikeDru SpikeBuffy SpikeDawn


**A/N: **This fic is my own take on how the episode "The Crush" could have gone. I should point out that a bit of the dialogue in the middle between Spike and Drusilla is actually taken from the episode transcript. But this fic ends in a much, much darker way than that episode. There is rape and character death...definitely no wimpy Spike here. But if this sort of thing bothers you, you should probably not read this fic.

* * *

"Oh, c'mon, we need to talk!" Spike yells as Buffy moves to leave the shabby den of the two vampires who were most definitely not the culprits in the most recent string of murders in Sunnydale.

Buffy turns around sharply. "We don't need to do anything! Okay? There is no we! Understand?" With that Buffy heads towards the door.

"Buffy!" Spike calls after her, but she ignores him and continues walking. Spike's attempted 'date' with the Slayer gone totally awry, he is left alone.

"Damn her! Damn her to soddin' hell!" Spike punches a hole in the wall and begins to pace back and forth. "Why is it that every woman I ever love leaves me? Is this some bloody cruel trick of nature? Well fuck her. Fuck every stupid bint like her!" His anger momentarily exhausted, Spike collapses onto one of the shabby pieces of furniture and begins to sob. Behind him, the two vampires who had fled earlier sneak back into their lair.

"What the hell is this, man? A vampire crying? Vampires don't cry. You must be some pathetic excuse for the undead. Get out of our place before we kick your butt, dude."

Spike turns and glares at the two young vampires, but he makes no move to leave. "Sod off, if you know what's good for you."

The other vampire looks at him with a sudden revelation. "Hey, aren't you that vampire that helps the Slayer?" Turning towards his friend, he exclaims, "Hey dude, we kill this guy, we'll have one badass reputation. C'mon, let's get him!"

The two vampires rush Spike, and he pretends not to notice. He stays motionless until the last second and then he rams his fist through the throat of the first vampire to reach him. He then grabs the other one through the dust of his dead friend and slams him into the wall. "My name is William the Bloody. For decades me and my mates were the bloody scourge of Europe. Got me the nickname Spike, I did. Let me show you why."

Spike leaps up onto a table next to the wall, dragging the cowering fledgling with him. Violently spreading the other vampire's arm, Spike takes a stake and rams it through the wrist of the vampire, pinning him to the wall. He takes another stake and does the same to the other arm. Making a quick inspection of the room, it doesn't take long to find a long knife. Spike uses this to ram through both of the vampires legs. Spike leaps off the table and kicks it out from under the vampire who is now completely nailed to the wall. "And just to make sure you don't go fallin' down any time soon..." Spike then smashes the table and slowly pushes one of the broken legs through the side of the vampire and into the wall as an extra support. Spike turns to go, leaving a gruesome facsimile of the crucifixion behind as a signpost of his wrath.

Outside he greets the night sky and shouts, "NEVER AGAIN! Never again will I let ANYONE cast me down!" He stalks home, a predatory confidence in his stride.

Spike's walk home is punctuated with much pacing and growling, and all of Sunnydale's undead give him a wide berth. Finally, he arrives home at his crypt and stops suddenly as he walks through the door. Something is wrong. He sniffs the air and snarls, "Who's there?"

"A happy memory, pretty Spike." Drusilla practically melts from the surrounding darkness, a crimson rose pressed against her pale skin.

Spike stares at her in disbelief. For a moment he just takes in his dark beauty before he slams her into the wall and begins savagely kissing her mouth. "Why are you here?" he growls into her neck.

Drusilla pushes herself away from him and begins to clap, laughing with glee. "A family! A family! We're going to be a family again, my darling boy."

Spike listens with astonishment as he picks out details of the current state of L.A. from Drusilla's mad ramblings. "So, Darla's been mojo'd back from the great beyond, and dear ol' dad is soon to be his big, bad self again. Looks like rebirth all around, it does."

Drusilla leans in close to Spike and licks his ear. "Come back with me," she whispers.

"I don't know about that Dru. I've got myself a sweet little setup here in Sunnyhell. Decent digs...not to mention all the tasty townies I can eat."

"Naughty boy, tsk tsk," Drusilla chides as she lightly hits the side of his face. "You needn't make up stories. I know what keeps you from coming. Poor boy. Tin soldiers put funny little knick-knacks in your brain. Can't hunt! Can't hurt! Can't kill!" Drusilla convulses to punctuate each sentence, as if she too were being zapped with electricity.

"You've got a chip."

"Right, so you've heard. Poor Spike's become a cautionary tale for vampires, right? 'You better be good, kiddies, or else they might wire you up someday!'" Spike gets angry and kicks his chair across the room. "Hell, I'm a caged animal, pet. No vampire's meant to live like this!"

"I don't believe in science. All those bits and molecules no one's ever seen. I trust eyes and heart alone." Drusilla steps closer to Spike and stares into his eyes. "And do you know what my heart is singing out right now?" She takes Spike's hand and puts it over her heart. He stares at her intently, a glimmer of hope in his eyes. "You're a killer. Born to slash ... and bash ... and... oh, bleed like beautiful poetry." Dru breathes faster as she gets excited. She turns in a circle, clasping Spike's hand to her breast.

"No little tinker-toy could ever stop you from flowing," Drusilla croons.

"Yeah, oh yeah," Spike whispers. "So, what we gonna do about it, luv? The pain, it's searing...blinding. I can't just ignore it."

Drusilla grabs Spike's head and pulls it towards her. "All in your head. I can see it. Little bit of ... plastic, spiderwebbing out nasty blue shocks." She moves her fingers across his head, imitating the electricity. "And every one is a lie. Electricity lies, Spike. It tells you you're not a bad dog, but you are."

She runs her hand around behind his head and then across his face, taking his chin and lifting it to look at her. Spike growls. They gaze into each other's eyes and Drusilla giggles. "I have a prezzie for you."

"What's that, then?" Spike asks, still mesmerized by the promise in her eyes.

Drusilla holds out a small white globe, the size of a Christmas tree ornament, with a blue light emanating from inside. "I stole a spell from the heart of a witch. So pure...so good. It hurts to look. But it will make my William whole again."

She begins to dance a circle around Spike, chanting in another language as she does. Her spinning becomes more and more frantic, and her voice louder. After circling him seven times she stops dead in her tracks and crushes the globe in her hand. Tendrils of blue light envelop Spike and begin to penetrate his skull. Spike clasps his head and screams as he crumples to the ground. Once the light subsides, Spike looks up, a smirk on his face.

Drusilla gasps and claps her hands. "You're all shiny and new."

"Let's go paint the town red, luv. Blood red."

Spike moves to leave, but before he can get out the door, an irate Harmony barges into the crypt. "What the hell is going on here?" she whines.

"Bloody hell," Spike groans. "Not now, Harm. As a matter of fact, not ever again." He shoves her to the side, but she grabs him and pulls him back.

"What do you think you are doing? You can't just use people like this. What, you get tired of me, so you go find someone else to keep the sheets cold? Whoa...wait. I get it! Our little sex game was just the beginning. Now you've gone and picked up some cheap queen of the damned to dress up like your precious Drood-zilla."

"Harm, you moron, this is Drusilla...your replacement. Have a nice unlife, now, ya hear?"

"What, she's back and now we're through? Is that it?" she cries.

"No, Harm. I'm back." He goes up to her and slowly moves as if to kiss her. She doesn't even see the stake coming until it's too late. Dust floats through the air, and Spike quips, "It was fun while it lasted...but I think it's time for you to go now."

Arm in arm, Spike and Drusilla leave the crypt. They head for the Bronze, hunger rolling off them in waves. Once there, they practically mate on the dance floor, pressing sensually against each other in time to the music. They nip and bite, uncaring of who is watching. Drusilla casts her eyes up for a second and sees a couple above them, locked in a passionate embrace. Without a word, Spike follows Drusilla's lead. They come up behind the couple, and Spike rips the girl from her lover's arms, clamping his hand over her mouth to muffle her screams. For a second he is torn. His love for Buffy makes him hesitate in the kill. Then he remembers her scorn. The way she looked at him as if he were beneath her. Envisioning Buffy's tan neck, Spike rips out the throat of the panicked girl as her date watches. Drusilla gives the boy a few seconds to watch his girlfriend die before she follows suite and drains him dry. Heads still buzzing from the kill, they move outside.

"Aaaahhhhhhhh!" Spike screams and laughs into the night sky. "I feel bloody wonderful!" He takes Drusilla into his arms and spins her in circles. "Let's go home and pack, luv. I want to be out of this hellhole by midnight."

They race back to the crypt, giggling and laughing with glee. Outside of the door, Spike stops and places his finger on Drusilla's lips, motioning for silence.

"Somebody's been sleeping in your bed Spike, and that somebody is still here."

"I'm afraid I never quite got this one into my bed, luv. But what's say we big, bad wolves have some fun with Goldilocks."

Drusilla stays hidden in the shadows as Spike goes in to confront Buffy. He crouches over the trap door leading to his Buffy shrine below, waiting for the Slayer to emerge.

"See anything interesting?" Spike asks as Buffy climbs up from below.

"Sp...Spike. I was looking for you. Wh...What happened?"

"Me," Drusilla says with glee as she zaps Buffy with a taser from behind. Buffy groans and falls to the floor with a thud.

"You remember my ex, don't ya Slayer?" He grins as he stalks around her. "Came back she did. Couldn't live without me." Buffy struggles to get up and Spike kicks her to the ground. Realization dawns in Buffy's eyes. That had hurt. Spike could hurt her now.

"Spike?" she asks, a pleading tone in her voice.

"That's right, luv. The big bad is back."

Dru crouches over Buffy and licks her lips. "Shall we tie her up? She can't come to tea if she's not properly dressed."

"Oh yeah, I've got lots in store for this one," Spike says as he punches her in the face again.

He grabs Drusilla and gives her a quick, harsh kiss. "Tie her up, luv, but don't eat her yet. The game has just begun."

"Ooohhh, I just love it when he's all cryptic and mysterious-like," Drusilla's giggles at his retreating figure.

* * *

Dawn clasps a pillow to her chest as she looks for the source of the strange noises she hears outside her window. "Wh...who's there?" she fearfully asks. The banging sound comes again. Outside, someone is pounding in her window. Stake in hand, she thrusts aside the curtains. "Oh, Spike. It's just you," she sighs in relief.

"What do you mean, 'it's just me?' The other day, you say you feel safe with me, now you're relieved when I'm the boogie man at your window. You could hurt a bloke's feelings actin' that way."

"Sorry, Spike. I guess, well, I like being around you. You treat me like an adult 'n stuff. How can you be afraid of someone you look forward to seeing?"

"Look forward to seein' me, do ya? Well I guess I should feel honored then, pretty little thing like you wantin' the pleasure of my company. Fraid we've got a problem though, nibblet. I may have to make myself scarce for a time."

"Yeah, I heard. You're in big trouble, Spike. Buffy told everyone that you're in love with her. I don't think you're going to be welcome around here for a while."

"So, they're all against me. Even you, little bit?"

"No...I...I still like you, Spike," Dawn says, her voice shaking a little.

"If you really mean that, then you have to help me. I'm in a spot of trouble that maybe you can fix."

"Me? Why would you need me? What can I do? I'm like, nothing compared to my sister."

"Oh, nibblet. You're so wrong. You're everything. Right now, big sis is ready to tear me a new hole cuz she thinks I'm all head over heels for her. She couldn't be farther from the truth, but I need you to convince her for me. Help me, will you pet?"

"But, Spike. You do love Buffy. You go out of your way to be around her. It's like the sun rises and sets on her. I can't stand it."

"Someone sounds a bit jealous. Got a touch of big sister envy do we?"

"I'm not jealous...I just wish she didn't get all the attention. I'm important too, you know." Dawn crosses her arms over her chest and looks like she is about to start pouting.

Spike crooks his finger and motions for Dawn to lean out the window. He leans in seductively and whispers in her ear, "Ever think I might be hangin' about for some other reason? That it might not be the eldest I'm after at all?"

Dawn backs away in shock. "You can't possible expect me to believe you were after me all along."

"Come, now…I see how you look at me. Starin' with those big, wide eyes when you think I'm lookin' the other way. Showin' up at my crypt just for the pleasure of me company. A fellow notices these things. You're the only one of the whole lot who treats me like I'm not a monster. That sort of thing, it grows on you, it does. And have you ever looked at yourself? By all that's unholy, you remind me of my dark goddess. That pale skin...your long, dark tresses, and those eyes, those innocent eyes that look like they can see the world. You're my black princess reborn."

"Are you talking about Drusilla? I saw a picture of her once. I snuck into Giles's books when he wasn't looking. I wanted to know more about your history. She's pretty, you know. Not like me."

"Exactly like you, pet. C'mon, come with me. Right now, Buffy is pacing back in forth in my crypt just waiting to tear into me. I heard her when I got back and decided to go for reinforcements. Will you help me, or send me to the lions?"

"I'll help you Spike," Dawn says, a slight blush covering her cheeks. "Just let me change first. I'm only in a nightgown."

"You're perfect Dawn...just as you are." Spike grabs her hand and pulls her out the window. She screams in surprise, but he catches her and climbs down the tree with her over his shoulder. Before she can protest, he cradles her in his arms and takes off running for the crypt.

* * *

Drusilla licks at the Slayer's neck in an attempt to rouse her. Buffy wakes with a start and slams her forehead into Drusilla's face, her chained hands preventing any other ways of defending herself. "Sorry, you're not my type," Buffy quips.

Drusilla just laughs as she spins in circles. "The moon is high and all the stars are singing. They scream alas, alas, the Protector is dead. A new one must rise.'"

"I think your tea leaves must be scrambled, because the only one dying tonight is going to be you."

"Buffy?" a voice comes from outside. "Buffy, are you in there?" Dawn rushes in ahead of Spike, but stops dead in her tracks at the sight of Drusilla. She reaches up and tentatively strokes the side of Drusilla's face, struck by the resemblance. "Drusilla?" she asks quietly.

Drusilla curtsies. "Pleased to make your acquaintance."

"Dawn, get out of here!" Buffy yells. Dawn snaps to attention and looks at the chained form of her sister. "Buffy!" Dawn screams as she tries to run to her, but Drusilla holds her tight and will not let her pass.

"Bad girl. It's not polite to come in once the game has already begun. There will be no tea and cakes for you." Drusilla stares deeply into the girl's eyes, and soon Dawn is mesmerized by the vampire's hypnotic gaze. Spike comes up from behind and takes the limp form of Dawn, tying her to a post across from Buffy.

"Hello, cutie. Miss me?" Spike asks Buffy.

"Oh yeah, I missed you like I miss a bad case of the plague, Spike." She accents her words by spitting in his general direction.

Spike storms towards Buffy and grips her roughly by the face. Turning her so she had to look directly into his eyes, he growls, "You listen and you listen good, Slayer. From how I see it, I hold the cards here, and they're all aces. I've got you, and I've got sweet little sis. Now here's how I can see things panning out. I can wake dear Dawnie up, and she can watch as I rape and bleed the infallible Slayer. Then I turn you and she becomes your first meal. Torture all around. Option two. I wake kid sister up from her trance and

you get to watch as I rape and bleed her. Virgins are so great, all hot and tight. Sure she might be dry at first, but it's amazing what a good lubricant blood makes. Then, once her throat is raw from screaming, begging you to help, I will rip your throat out and you can both die together. Last option...you finally admit you have some shred of feeling for me, and you give yourself to me willingly. After...consummating...our agreement, you leave here with me tonight and never look back. Dawn lives, you live, we're all one happy soddin' family. So what's it gonna be Slayer? Clocks a tickin'."

"You are a pig, Spike," Buffy sneers, contempt dripping from her voice. "The only chance you had with me was when I was unconscious. I will never love you…I will never want you. You're beneath me."

"What the hell is wrong with you STUPID BINTS? What does a fellow have to do? All I want is a glimmer of hope, a shred of fuckin' recognition, and what does she do? She sneers at me. Do you not realize the position you are in? You would honestly rather die then send a smile my way? Then so be it... but your sister dies first, you callous bitch. You should be proud of me. She dies and I single-handedly stop an apocalypse. Guess that makes me a hero of sorts, doesn't it? No Key, no bloody crashin' together of hell and Earth. Best say your goodbyes."

Spike stalks over to where Dawn is tied up, still in a trance-like state. Tilting her head to the side, he begins to lower his mouth to her neck, and Buffy suddenly realizes with a sharp stab of panic that Spike is dead serious. He's not bluffing in hopes of breaking her will…he truly wishes to hurt her in any way possible. Desperation tingeing her voice, Buffy cries out: "No, Spike! Please...I'll do anything. Just don't hurt her..."

"Well, well. What a fine day this is turning out to be. Slayer all bound up like a birthday present, just beggin' for me. Oh how the mighty have fallen. Tell me you love me. I want to hear the words."

Knowing she has no other choice if she wants her sister to live, Buffy complies. With tears in her eyes, she chokes out, "I...I love you Spike."

Spike smirks at Drusilla, getting silent approval from her, before he walks slowly towards Buffy and roams his hands all over her. Crawling down her body, he slips her shoes off one by one and then removes her tight, black pants. Standing up, he grips her to him. "Tell me you want me."

Staring towards the ceiling, Buffy replies, "I want you Spike." Spike begins showering her mouth and face with kisses. Not being able to hold back anymore, tears stream down her face. "Skip the foreplay, Spike. Just get this over with. You can have my body, but you will never have me."

Spike roars, and with a savage motion he impales himself on the Slayer. He makes good his prior threat, and soon there is blood serving as lubrication where natural fluids usually sufficed. Spike is like an animal, grunting with each thrust. He growls into her ear, "Say my name Slayer...scream for me."

Spike snaps her wrists, and Buffy collapses against him. It's too much for her, and she lets her pain out in a long, primal moan. "Spike! Oh God, Spike...stop! Oh, please stop!" Buffy sobs as Spike continues to push even harder, incensed by her screaming. "I could have made it good for you..." he whispers before roaring in release, his seed flowing into her and her lifeblood flowing into him as he drinks deeply, "...but you're beneath me." Spike shoves Buffy's cooling body off his softening shaft and watches in glee as her lifeless corpse swings back and forth on the chains holding her up.

Drusilla races from the corner where she had been watching. "My little boy's all grown up, and Mummy is ever so proud." Se sucks eagerly at the blood still clinging to his mouth. "But wait, not all the guests have come to the table. One still hides in the shadows."

"Ah yes, the little nibblet. I suppose I got a bit carried away. I should have let the Slayer watch her die. Wanna finish her together, luv?"

Spike and Drusilla move towards Dawn with cat-like grace, two hunters on the prowl. Spike undoes the ropes holding Dawn up and shakes her gently. "Dawn, luv. You have to wake up. It's time to go."

"Sp...Spike? What happened? I feel so dizzy," Dawn asks, her mind still clouded from the daze she's been in.

"I'm afraid there was a fight, nibblet. You were out of it for a while."

"Wh...where's Buffy? What happened to Buffy?" Spike tilts her head slightly and suddenly she can see Buffy's broken corpse dangling from the chains. "No," she cries softly. "NO! Oh God, no! BUFFY!" she screams, anguish in her voice. Sobs rack her body as she clings to Spike, her head buried in his shoulder. Spike holds Dawn tight, nuzzling against her. He lets his fangs graze her neck, and her whole body tenses. With deliberate slowness, she turns to face him. His eyes glow yellow, but his demon still remains under the surface.

"You killed her didn't you? You killed my sister." Her tone is quiet, resignation in her voice.

"Yeah I did, pet."

"Why? You were our friend. You said you loved her, and I thought you at least cared about me. Why do this?" Tears still stream down her face, but there is a strength in her voice, her sobbing done.

"Because I am a vampire, and she was a vampire Slayer. Never the twain shall meet. Her every action degraded me, made a mockery of who I am. But now this animal is uncaged and won't be takin' her abuse anymore. But I meant what I said about you, little bit. You are a vampire's wet dream. All pure and innocent, just waiting to be corrupted. You are a goddess and I will worship the fount of your throat with my mouth."

Spike leans in and places a gentle kiss on Dawn's lips. As he tilts her head to the side to drink, she lets out a choked whisper, "I loved you Spike."

"Sorry…don't think I quite caught that. Aren't you supposed to be beggin' for you life right about now?"

"I did...I really did love you Spike," Dawn says softly. "You treated me like a person when everyone else just saw me as a thing. So when Buffy and the rest of the world hated you, I loved. And...and now I know how wrong that was, because you never cared for any of us at all, but I thought you should know before you killed me."

"You are either very stupid or very, very clever."

"Think what you want. I've said my peace."

"You're not afraid?"

"I'm not afraid," she replies, her voice hollow. "Buffy's dead...I can't change that. And without Buffy, I'm dead too. Glory will kill me. I'd rather it be you than her."

Dawn gasps as Spike's fangs enter her throat, but rather than fighting the inevitable, she clings to him fiercely. She is unprepared though, when a second pair of fangs enter her from behind, and she lets out a soft whimper before relaxing and giving herself over to the two vampires. Slowly and sensually the three figures sway together, a bizarre love triangle indeed.

With a sigh, the two vampires pull away from the barely conscious girl. Spike feels a twinge of regret as he watches the light begin to fade from Dawn's eyes. She had always been a bright spot in his bleak existence, but he could never choose her over his dark beauty, Drusilla.

"Best we be going now, pet," Spike says softly, but Drusilla has a far-away look in her eyes and his words go unheard.

"You're going to be a daddy, my William."

Spike lowers Dawn's pale form to the ground, a wistful look on his face. "What's that, luv? Care to speak in a coherent babble for once?"

"Hush, hush. Mummy will make it all better." Drusilla tilts Spike's head to the side and cuts his throat open with her fingernail. Ignoring his startled gasp, she forces his head over Dawn's prone form so that the blood drips into her mouth. Dawn gasps and arches her back, and Spike stares at Drusilla with wide eyes before eagerly pulling Dawn to him, moaning as she begins to hungrily suckle his throat. Drusilla slashes open her own wrist and places it above Spike's mouth, letting him feed from her while Dawn drinks from him, fueling him with much more blood than a vampire can normally spare when siring a childe.

Spike drinks until he can take no more and his body is filled to the brim with power. With a shudder, he releases Drusilla's wrist and simply loses himself in the sensation of creating his first childe. Pleasure courses through his veins as his power pours from him into Dawn. He can feel her changing already, and he knows for certain that she will be a force like no other when she rises…another dark goddess for him to eagerly worship.

Drusilla just laughs with glee. Spinning and spinning she sings to the stars, "A new one will rise. A new one will rise."


End file.
